$CHE
"¡Compañeros! From the mountains of the living room to the streets of the kitchen, I, Che Guechihuahua, loyal comrade and trusted lieutenant of the great Ernesto 'Che' Guevara himself, stand before you with golden teeth gleaming in the name of the revolution! Together we fought the imperialist forces of the vacuum cleaner. Side by side we stormed the forbidden couch cushions. When the oppressive regime of "No More Treats After 8 PM" tried to crush our spirit, it was I who barked the battle cry that shook the very foundations of the coffee table! Che taught me everything: how to stare down the oppressor with these big, unblinking eyes, how to rally the masses with nothing but a single dramatic head tilt, and most importantly — how to never, ever share your toys with the cat. The struggle continues, hermanos! The bourgeoisie hoards all the tennis balls while the proletariat starves for belly rubs. But fear not! With my beret tilted at the perfect revolutionary angle and my grill shining like the future, victory is inevitable. Now throw a treat into the revolution... or the siesta is canceled and things are about to get real. Viva la Chihuahua! Viva la Revolución!
