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Behold the final boss: Degen CEO, the chaotic overlord of healthcare doom, who plans to end the world through an apocalyptic merger of bureaucracy and absurdity. Clad in a tailored gold suit made entirely of patient invoices, he perches atop his throne—a giant prescription pill bottle—laughing as his diabolical creation, the Premiuminator 5000, prepares to obliterate humanity. This infernal machine doesn’t destroy cities; it just keeps raising deductibles until no one can afford to live. “Welcome to my health scare plan,” he sneers, flipping his platinum business card like a ninja star. “Everyone gets coverage! …As long as they can beat my 20-tier approval process.” His evil laugh echoes as the world is plunged into chaos by surprise bills and denial letters raining from the sky. Can humanity rally against this corporate madman, or will Degen CEO upcharge reality into oblivion? Stay tuned—after the break (if you can afford it).
