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REMOTEX ($REMOTEX) SpaceX took us to space. REMOTEX takes us on the only journey that matters: finding the damn remote. Forged in the tears of forgetful consumers — the people who can open a rocket stream in 4K but can’t locate a black rectangle on a black couch. Science said “reusable rockets.” We said “reusable excuses.” Mission profile • Launchpad: living room • Trajectory: under the couch → between cushions → “I left it in the kitchen?” • Payload: pure cope • Re-entry: always face-down, batteries dying We are not building satellites. We are building a culture around the oldest human tragedy after taxes: you had it five minutes ago. REMOTEX — because the real multiplanetary species still can’t find the clicker. LFG. Point it at the TV. Or the wall. Same energy.